How does she do it?! Once inside, away from the cameras, we can only assume that various nubile members of Fortnums staff were forced to strip naked and throw foie gras at each other while the royal wenches laughed and laughed.
Since proving last week that she is perfectly capable of walking, talking and waving unaided by more than a medium-sized entourage Kate Middleton, the new Princess of Hearts, has been really earning her keep.
It really is heartwarming that our beloved Royal family have decided to take some absolutely typical Normal Just Like You And Me Pleb Citizens under their swannish wing, eh? Bored of sitting on their arses in separate palaces, eating swan pate and beating servants, the Queen, Kate Middleton and Camilla Parker Bowles decided to go on a raucous girls? Well, this is the wife of the third in line to the British throne, who is currently in the middle of a media tour of the far East.